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HR Hiring Horror Stories (Chapter 4)


Guest post from the Million Dollar Employee

Just in time for Halloween, G&A Partners is resurrecting one of our most popular topics: Hiring Horror Stories!

If you’ve seen my video (it’s right here, at you may remember meeting a certain job applicant named Doug.

Mr. ACME had quite an experience during Doug’s tenure at his company. Let’s hear Mr. ACME tell his story…



It was a dark and stormy night. I’m sitting alone in my office at midnight, wishing I was home. But instead, I find myself staring at a scary sight: stacks and stacks of paperwork that must get done tonight.

I just got my dream business up and running, but right now it looks more like a nightmare. Every day when I come to work, I find myself devoting most of my time to administrative and HR issues. I know this stuff is important, but I didn’t start a business just to do paperwork!

I need to hire some help- fast. Most of the people I interview do not have expertise in all the areas of HR I need; that is, until I interview Doug.

Doug seems like a breath of fresh air. He comes to the interview on time, is dressed for success, and assures me that he is an expert in all the requirements for the job. I hire him on the spot.

But when Doug shows up on Monday (late), I begin to wonder if this is the person I hired…or his evil twin. Doug’s appearance is frightening enough.  Gone is the professional suit, replaced by a wrinkled shirt and old jeans (talk about business casual), an unshaven beard, and the look of someone that has given up on shampoo.

It only gets worse from there. I spend a good amount of money acquiring the right software Doug needs for his job. He assured me in his interview that he was an expert, yet on the first day it becomes apparent that he doesn’t know these programs at all. When I ask if he needs help, I find him posting pictures on his personal social networking pages. I try talking to him, but during our conversation he keeps texting people on his phone, and abruptly leaves the room to “take a call.”

Well by then I had had enough. Needless to say, Doug didn’t last much longer at my company. Luckily for me, I soon found the Million Dollar Employee. My nightmare is finally over, and I am able to do what I love most: watch my business grow.

Let’s stay connected,

The Million Dollar Employee

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